Ever have a sh*tty job that you wanted to complain about in a weekly submission-based column named after Blink-182 lyrics? Send your submissions to worksuxiknow[at]gmail.com!



So I work at a place similar to a Chuck E' Cheese, so I obviously deal with kids all the time.  Well one day, an older woman approaches the front counter and tells us that a kid took a dump on the floor.  She told us as she was preparing to leave.  This stuff happens normally and is nothing new.  Well when we looked at the security tapes to see who did it, it turns out that the granddaughter of the lady who told us, was the one who did it.  Instead of taking the kid to the bathroom, the woman moves the rocking chair she was sitting on, has the kid pull down her pants, crap, then puts the rocking chair back over the crap and tells us.  She never came back.
-Chris

I work at a fairly large retail drug store and encounter all different types of interesting people. I had an older man stop me as I was stocking shelves one day and tell me that I reminded him of his second ex-wife and he was so glad she had died.
-Anonymous

Within the first two hours of my first substitute teaching job a 5th grade girl told me I had a nice butt. I was sexually harassed by an eleven year old.
-Ethan

I work at a federal agency in Washington DC. The people I share my office with are three overweight women in their mid to late 30's who are constantly eating fast food that they know will give them gas. The rest of the day consists of them farting, laughing about how loud and bad the farts are, and then trying to cover up their farts by spraying Lysol in the air. That is what your tax payers money goes towards.
-Anonymous, GMU

I was fired from an Italian restaurant after three days for altering the Mexican/Italian employee ratio. I made the place "too Italian."
-Craig, UTSA

In high school I worked for a small company that detailed cars. The majority of the cars we cleaned were trade-ins from a local used car dealer. One time I started scrubbing the interior of a "low mileage, one owner" only to find several hundred dried boogers stuck to the front of the driver's seat. Although this was gross and nasty to clean it was not near as bad as the mini-van that somehow had a rabbit go through the windshield. It took hours to clean out all the little, furry, bloody pieces of rabbit meat and glass from all three rows of seats and the back window.
-Brian

In high school, I took a summer job working construction. We were in the crawlspace of an old farmhouse when we came across a bunch of exposed wiring from the 50's. "Don't worry," my partner says. "Those aren't live." They, of course, were. When I brushed up against them a few minutes later, all I saw was this blue flash as I was flung backwards, whacking my head on a joist. As I lay bleeding and smoking in the crawlspace, the home owner yelled that her power just went out. When my partner told her why, she waited a beat then yelled, "Well, turn it back on!" The heartless bitch…
-Anonymous