Ever have a sh*tty job that you wanted to complain about in a weekly submission-based column named after Blink-182 lyrics? Send your submissions to worksuxiknow[at]gmail.com!
I worked at a Dunkin Donuts in High School conveniently located next to a liquor store and across from a drug dealer. Our customers were mostly potheads, alcoholics, coke addicts, crackheads, etc. Some of them were really nice and tipped generously (even if they didn't know it), but this one time these two addicts come through the drive-thru and the driver tries to go into the backseat to have sex with the currently naked woman in the back while I made his coffee. Getting his attention so he could pay was a little awkward.
I used to work in a department store while I was at highschool. One day this blind guy comes in wanting to buy some nails (I'm not sure if he was intending to use them himself), so one of my supervisors askes me to escort him to the hardware section and help him find the right ones. He grabs onto my arm, I take him to get his nails (chatting along the way), and then we go to the check out. After he makes his purchase, he thanks me and tells my superviser that I'm a "good girl". It's always nice to get good customer feedback, but I'm a guy.
-Jeremy, Palmerston North, New Zealand
Our store was called by the local cops and they asked for a rep to come to the convenience store across the street. There were two guys in handcuffs and we had to identify 50 lbs of stolen steaks, that they had smuggled out in their pants. I mentioned we were going to throw the meat away and the criminals asked for it as they were being arrested, to which I shouted "it was in your pants!" Then the cop said, "That's what she said."
I used to work at American Eagle Outfitters, one night I was on the cash registers and my manager was at the front of the store folding clothes. A man storms in, walks right past my manager who asked him 3 times in a row if he could help him, and instead insists on demanding me for an application. (I am ringing up another customer) I tell him my manager would be more than happy to help him. He turns around and yells to my manager, "application!!" (we don't give applications to everyone who walks in we give interest cards) one of the questions asks if you have any retail experience and if you do please list. The guy had checked yes and wrote "Yard Sailing".
In high school and first year I worked at a store that sold pet food. The summer after highschool I got hurt playing rugby and was on crutches for a while. While on crutches at work I usually just sat behind the register and cashed out the customers. One night a lady came in with her little fluffy white dog in her purse, put the dog on the counter and told me the kind of food her "princess" gets. She asked me to go get the 5lbs bag of food for her. Not wanting to be rude and say no, I told her I was on crutches and hoped she would get the bag herself. Instead she said, well that must difficult getting around and watched as I crutched to the other side of the store, jammed the bag of dog food between my arm and the crutch, and crutched back to the cash register. She stood there watching me the whole time, paid for her food and left without saying thank you.
-Mike, Brock University
I joined the army to get out of alaska and see the world. After basic training they stationed me back at Ft. Richardson, Alaska. Theres something slightly aggravating about training for desert warfare in negative 40 degree temperatures.
I used to work at the safari ride at Disney World, and one of the jobs was to send groups with wheel chairs to a special dock where the trucks drop you off and pick you up at the same place, so you don't have to hike back to get your scooter or wheel chair. It usually wasnt any faster than the regular lines. This one day a lady wanted to use the wheel chair dock because they had a disability fast pass thing, but her kid wasn't in a wheel chair or anything, so I tried explaining to her there wasn't really any reason to do it, since it would probably be slower anyway. She didn't believe me, but as I was talking to her the 8 or 9-year old she was with reached out and squeezed my left tit. She simply replied, "He's autistic, love." I let them pass.
-AT, Portland State U.
I work at a major toy store and I worked this past black friday. Not only did I work a 23.5 hour shift with only 30min off but I also got hit by a car (at 5am), a lady who's old as f*ck ran a shopping cart into me and called me an asshole cause we were out of a toy, but I also was cussed out in 4 different languages. Oh and I slipped and fell via a green-shit filled diaper.