Ever had a funny/interesting/awesome run in with the law? Want to incriminate yourself on a worldwide-scale? Submit your stories to IFoughtTheLawAndDidOrDidNotWin at gmail.?
One day I was out driving. I had a drivers exam coming up so I was practicing good habits, like stopping for pedestrians at cross walks and following the posted speed limit. On one stretch of road, a cop came up behind me and flashed his lights soI oblidged and pulled over. The cop comes up to my window.
"Do you know how fast you were going?" he said.
"I don't know, 50?" I said.
"Isn't the speed limit 50?"
The guy seemed to freeze in his thought process for a good minute before mumbling something about forgetting the limit in that zone, apologizing for the inconvenience andheading back to his car.
One time I stole a few packs of Pokemon cards from Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, one of the employees caught me in the act of stuffing them into my pocket and brought me up to the security office. I sat in a chair as the security guard opened one of the packs of Pokemon cards. There was a very awkward silence as the man opened shuffled through the cards. Finally he said, "These cards suck." Not knowing how to respond, I quickly blurted out that I was doing Wal-Mart a favor by taking those cards. It was a good thing that the security guard was an avid Pokemon fan. He agreed with me and let me go without calling the police or anything.
When I was 12 I was a resident at an orphanage with a working dairy farm. The place was a hell-pit and the other kids sucked, but I loved the bovines. Anyway, one of my favorite cows was scheduled for the chopping block and I didn't want to lose her. The night before she met the butcher I broke out of my cottage and rode that cow the hell out of there. Cows were not meant for riding, but still we made it about three miles before the flashing lights of the county sheriff tracked us down.
A couple years back in Atlanta during law school, my friend bet me I wouldn't "Dukes of Hazzard" (run and slide) over the hood of a taxi. Without hesitation, I ran and slid and he followed right behind me. Well, there happened to be a cop standing nearby that we failed to notice. He yelled at us to stop and I instinctively took off running while my friend blended into the crowd. I ran through the parking lot, jumped a fence and kept going across the street only to see a cruiser stopped and an officer running toward me. I had no time to react and was already running towards him, so (probably to his surprise) I lowered my shoulder and ran over him. Now I'm scared shitless. So I continued to sprint full-speed through downtown Atlanta, wearing dress shoes and I falling every 50 yards. Every alley I turned down was well-lit with no place to hide. After coming out of my second or third useless alley, I turned the corner to see the cop I ran over swinging his nightstick. I ducked down and took it in the thigh. Then he tackled me. I cried that I wasn't resisting, to which he replied, "Yeah I know you're not resisting!" As he took me back to the scene of the crime, I calmly and sincerely explain that an arrest would derail my entire career path of becoming a lawyer, and that I only did what I did out of fear. His resolution was to have me give cab driver $100 and let me go. That was one cool cop.
My school is walking distance from the beach, and I like to go down to the water to practice my martial arts when I have free time. One day I was walking back to my dorm around midnight, swinging my nunchucks about, when a police car pulled up and told me to drop the weapon and put my hands up. I then heard him say over his radio, "suspicious individual found, requesting backup." He asked me what I was doing and said, "Actually I don't know whether or not nunchucks are illegal." I insisted that they weren't, but he told his partner to watch me while he looked it up. We chatted about my studies, her job and what have you while the other cop looked through a book to find out if nunchucks were legal. Then backup arrived and an older cop (probably their superior) came out and said "Hey why haven't you arrested this guy?" to which he responds "I don't think he was actually doing anything wrong." The older cop told me not to have my weapons out in public because they could be confused for sticks of dynamite. He also said that I was lucky he wasn't the one to find me, because I'd be in jail if that were the case. They let me go and told me not to get in any more trouble.
My friends and I used to think it was fun to throw Chillzones (slushies) from Cumberland Farms at oncoming cars. Over the course of a year, we perfected this art. Our big event was Free Chillzone Day. On this day, we drove around grabbing as many free icy beverages as we could, and chucked them at cars. One car we hit whipped around and started chasing us. We fled, pulled our car down a side street, and thought we had lost him. We also thought we had a flat tire, so we stopped to check. Big mistake. Blue and red Lights. We'd hit a cop with a slushy. My friend was arrested for "assault on a police officer with a deadly weapon," and had to go to court. Luckily, the judge dismissed the charges. We got away with merely an apology to the officer.
This past week after the big snowstorm, my brother and I took our jeeps into a deserted parking lot up in the hills to do donuts. It was all fun and games until a police car showed up. After talking with him for a little bit, we let him drive our jeep and plow through the big drifts. Then he got in his patrol car and did donuts with us. It got stuck and we spent the next hour helping him dig it out. Then he drove off. Coolest cop ever.