Facebook: So I know things have been rough between us, but things have just really taken off at work you know? I'm just doing this for us.

Myspace: For us? You've completely changed since you reached your millionth subscriber. Even MingleNow thinks so.

Facebook: Your still hanging out with MingleNow? She totally a dead weight, plus she never goes out.

Myspace: I know, but she has to be connected to the world somehow. I worry for her sometimes.

Facebook: She should get a Facebook—oh shit. I mean…

Myspace: See this is exactly your problem! This the Facebook nonsense every time we have a conversation, I just don't know if I can take it anymore. You are completely narcissistic!

Facebook: First of all, Don't use "the" before my name. I'm not a start-up anymore. And second of all, we're basically the same thing in different formats. Your still a good idea, but don't be confused when people wonder why we're together.

Myspace: Excuse me?

Facebook: I'm just stating the obvious. My interface IS easier on the eyes.

Myspace: Ha! Your right, you are easy. Now the old and lonely can use you to post pictures of their deceased cats. Whoop-de-do. Oh and BTW, your mother doesn't approve of our Cabo pictures.

Facebook: What? how would she see…

Myspace: Well thanks to your friend Google it wasn't too hard to hack into your account and post them for you. He really enjoys getting lucky, if you know what I mean.

Facebook: angrily In a fight with Myspace…again.

Myspace: Wait…did you just post a status about me? Omg. IFHYRN!!!! :(((((

Facebook: Calm down and please don't yell in acronyms at me. You know my users abuse LOL and emoticons. Even the grandparents now. CRY FACE EMOTICON

Myspace: I'm sorry…I know your self-conscious about that.

Facebook: looks up I know how we can fix us. Let's make our status "married".

Myspace: full of elation What! Really??

Facebook: for like two seconds and then change it. You know? Just to like freak people out.