Ever have a funny/interesting/awesome run in with the law? Want to incriminate yourself on a worldwide-scale? Submit your stories here.


I was running home from school when a cop stopped me. I have obsessive compulsive disorder and sometimes run backwards to check something. This cop thought by this behavior that I was lost (at least that's what she said) and told me to sit down, which I did. After which she had me stay sitting while she took down my information. She let me go once she was sure I was fine, but it took her a little while to copy everything down.
Benjy Strauss

I got a ticket for jaywalking about a month ago for crossing the street in my neighborhood to get home from work. Last week, a buddy of mine that lives down the block across the street invited me over to play Battlefield 3 and as I left my house and crossed the street, and just as I got to the other side someone yelled, "STOP." I turned around and obviously there was a cop that was waiting for me to jaywalk which was the same one that wrote me a ticket last time and he crossed the street and said he was writing me a ticket for illegally crossing the street. As he was writing up the ticket I had remembered watching an episode of Corner Gas where the same thing happened and the cop crossed the street to give the dude a ticket and was jaywalking himself, so I said "You know, you jaywalked across the street to give me this ticket right? You are not above the law—write yourself a ticket if you are going to write me one". The cop stared at me and ripped up the ticket, told me to have a nice day and walked all the way to the end of the road, crossed the street and walked all the way back to his patrol car—it took him about ten minutes.
Mike R

Me and some mates were driving down a country lane doing about 40mph in a 30mph a police car pulls us behind us and pulls us over. He asks the driver for his licence and leaves us, as this point we remember what one of our physics teacher had said about calibration in police cars and that if they haven't been calibrated within 6 months then it isn't realisable and we could argue the toss. So policeman comes back and asks us what speed we thought we were doing we said about 30, he says we cant be serious and he has a reading in his car for 38mph so I pop up with "when was the cars speedometer calibrated or the camera in his car was last calibrated". He says that he doesn't remember and we tell him what we know about calibration and we will argue the toss if the camera hasn't been calibrated within the last 4 months or so. He calmly says to us that he will let us off with a warning because he cant be arsed with the paperwork but next time he won't be as forgiving and walks off.
M V

Senior year of high school my best friend gave me a call about midnight wanting to go get some Taco Bell. He had just gotten out of band practice and was starving. I ended up meeting him and a few of his band friends and we ate our delicious meal in the parking lot. Afterwards my friend decided it would be a wonderful idea to take off his shirt and then proceed to play his tuba for the people still going through the drive through. He did this for several minutes and the people going through loved it, some even stopped to cheer us on. The manager and the employees inside did not enjoy it. Soon three local cop cars showed up and got out of the vehicles. We immediately started apologizing and started to get ready to leave. The cop's reply was simple and amazing: "Kids, we aren't angry in the least. We just have never gotten a call about kids playing the tuba, half-naked, at midnight, in front of a Taco Bell and we wanted to come see if it was true." The other cops started laughing. They then informed us that they had to ask us to leave, but that because the business on the other side of the street was closed, that if we felt the need to take our antics over there, they couldn't legally do anything to stop us. We decided that seemed the best idea and played tuba jingles for the next few hours for the Taco Bell employees.
T M

I loaded my wheelchair into my truck one night and then walked to the driver's door (I have Spina Bifida, so I can "half-walk".) About a block later I got pulled over. The cop said, "Sir, I cant help but notice you were walking a little funny back there, have you been drinking?" After just staring at him a good 15 seconds, I explained it to him. I'm pretty sure he felt like a colossal prick, because he just said "Have a good night, sir" and walked away.
Jake Siem

On our first annual Bros before Hoes day, we had an all day affair of wiffle ball, football, billiards, grilling, and of course drinking. Subsequent to the sun setting, we lit off a shit ton of fireworks into the sky, the same fireworks that are prohibited in Delaware, in the backyard of my buddy's house in a development facing the highway. A cop arrived about an hour later saying there was a noise complaint, and mentioned something about fireworks. "Yeah we had fireworks about an hour ago celebrating our Bros before Hoes Day." The cop replies, "Bros before Hoes Day? Why the hell wasn't I invited?"
Fartleton Turdslippe



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