Kids who grew up with snow always make fun of the kid from California who thinks three inches is a blizzard. But I bet the same thing happens in California when a New Yorker dives for cover the first time they feel the ground shake. "Oh come on! It couldn't be more than a 3. They're not even closing the roads. Get out from under the desk. Wussy." After a long hot summer, the weather hits 50 degrees and you rummage through your closet to find your coat, scarf, gloves, and wool hat. But after just one week of winter, your view changes. "It's 50 out? Damn it's hot! I shouldn't have packed up all of my shorts." Every year, I have to buy a new scarf. I'm not sure why I can never keep a scarf in the same place for the 9 months I don't use it, but I guess it's impossible. Once, I tried keeping the scarf in the arm of my winter coat. That year, I had to buy a new coat. What impresses me most about cold weather is that no matter how bad it gets, some girls will still not wear coats to bars. If guys cared as much about looking good rather than being warm, the wool-hat-with-the-little-beanie-on-top industry would take a serious hit. The weirdest climate is the one you create in your dorm when you're heater is on too high so you sit by your open window while it's snowing. And instead of finding the middle ground of temperatures, you become the McBLT in those old commercials, with your hot side hot, your cool side cool, and your buns a bit too soggy to be comfortable. Like this column? Then buy the book!