I barely care about the random thoughts you post on Twitter and Facebook. I don't care at all about what you think your cat is thinking about.
Talking about Nickelback at this point is like talking about religion. You've heard the pitch, and you probably have a pretty strong opinion. Any discussion beyond that is either a violent argument between two equally stubborn sides, or a useless round of self-congratulatory agreement. There's nothing more to say.
So, you're living a life of haughty cynicism and detached coolness, when suddenly you have to say something boring and sincere the very antithesis of your manufactured image. But you have a plan: you'll just say "Happy birthday" or "Welcome back" in a stupid voice to show you're totally above everything. Now no one can ever get a glimpse of your humanity. Image preserved!
You found a song you love, and you think your friends will love it too. Great! But don't be in the same room when you share it, or you're guaranteeing yourself three minutes of your friends silently staring at you while you make a face that says "Eh? Pretty good, eh?"
Yep, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was a cartoon masterpiece, but only because you were a kid. And like all kids, you had horrible taste. It's fine to think back fondly on this stuff, but if you try to convince someo
ne that The NeverEnding Story is a triumph of cinema you're just going to sound like a scared man-child clinging desperately to his youth.