Lil Wayne recently announced that he would be taking a hiatus from rapping to pursue skateboarding. In honor of this being the most important thing to happen in the news this past week, here are 10 more celebrity career switches I'd like to see:
2. Usain Bolt to rickshaw driver or, should I say, the fastest rickshaw driver in the world.
3. Lady Gaga to chef, she's already pioneered the technique of using natural body heat to defrost meat before cooking, now she just has to sell it.
4. Mitt Romney to private investigator, that way maybe he can find his tax returns from the last ten years.
5. Kel Mitchell to anything with a steady paycheck. We haven't seen Kel in awhile and I just hope he's doing alright. I'm a worrier.
6. Michelle Jenneke to professional trampoline tester; it's hard work but someone's gotta do it. Hard, sweaty, bouncy work. For safety. (Video resume)
7. Curiosity Mars Rover to metal detector because if it can find life on Mars, it can find my goddamn car keys.
8. Gabby Douglas, McKayla Maroney, Aly Raisman, and any other members of the 2012 Women's Gymnastics Team to high school, then college. They may get drunk off half of a Coors Light, but no one on campus can do a better kegstand.
9. Madonna to an accountant or bank teller or, I don't know, maybe a Wal-Mart greeter or something; anything to keep her within the United States since she seems to be trying to piss off every other country in the world one by one. Seriously, after offending the Israelis, Palestinians, French, and now the Russians in one tour alone, Madonna looks to be causing more harm to the world than Gavrilo Princip.
10. Your Mom to porn star.