Everyone's talking about this Ryan Lochte guy. Full disclosure: I have zero idea who this clown is, but he doesn't sound so great to me. Why, here are some random activities I can probably school him in lol! ;-)

  • Making the perfect grilled cheese sandwich
  • Most card games
  • NBA Jam for Sega Genesis
  • Trivia
  • Backstroke
  • Breaststroke
  • Swimming
  • Competitive swimming
  • Going fast in water
  • Competitive water sports (including swimming)
  • Any activity that takes place in a pool
  • Having muscles associated with the act of swimming
  • The men's 200m freestyle
  • Propelling myself forward through a body of liquid
  • Being an athlete who specializes in swimming
  • The men's 400m individual medley
  • Being one of the fastest swimmers on the planet
  • Operating my body in the water with the kind of speed and precision that only comes with a lifetime of training
  • Controlling my breathing while swimming
  • Beating Michael Phelps at swimming
  • Knowing the perfect amount of corn chips to serve with a grilled cheese sandwich
  • Being a winner