Speaking of loose, "spring" is derived from "springen," the Latin word for "no strings attached sex." However, we know that for a few of you freaks out there, unprotected intercourse with a random can get old – fast. (And that's not the only thing that's coming quickly.) So here are a few suggestions to put some spring in your, uh" step.



1.Your hot lab partner
2.The professor in that class you're failing
3.The TA from Analysis (talk about extra credit)
4.Borrow your roommate's vibrator
5.Screw your roommate's significant other
6.Breakup with your girlfriend
7.Hijack a member of the sailing team's boat, Captain Morgan-style
8.Tape over your roommate's Filmmaking 101 Final with "A Night in (insert the girl's name here)"" two points if her name's "Paris"
9.Swipe as many condoms from your college's health center as you can (rubbers don't grow on trees back home)
10.Get tested (no, really – you should go to your finals)
11.Finally tell off that friend that nobody likes
12.Develop a fetish (with footwear, melted butter, feces, whatever)
13.Sleep with an entire team: football, dance, ping pong (note: must be more than five players" triple points if coed)
14.Mark your territory – have sex in/at as many historic places around campus as possible (Dave Sweet – meet me at the bookstore" I'll letcha place your bookmark in between my pages – MO)
15.Sleep with a cook from your favorite station in the cafeteria (make "'em leave the hairnet on)
16.Have homosexual relations (shut up, it's not like you don't have fantasies)
17.Try and find an orifice for each of your ten digits
18.Sleep with whoever lives in your freshman year dorm room (sure hope you lived in a quad)
19.Prove that you have world domination: nail every exchange student in sight
20.Do it in costumes appropriate for your college
21.Hit it with the college mascot
22.After completing the above, steal his uniform and seal the deal with the first footballer you find
23.Place a personal ad in your college's publication
24.Have Facebook sex (what do you use YOUR wall for?!)
25.Everyone has that one friend whose engaged – talk "'em outta it
26.Screw your RA (literally) and report them to ResLife
27.Reach the Big O during Bio
28.Get off in all of your classes
29.Erect something of your own in the engineering building
30.Poke that professor who joined Facebook to spy on you
31.Take a trip down memory lane and go hookup with your first college hookup
32.Everyone has "the one who got away," so go get "'em" into bed
33.Offer to give campus tours so you can get with an incoming" or their mom
34.Pull an all nighter – no, really: get a hold of some Aderall and continue to reproduce on repeat
35.Next time you order in some food, make an attempt to do the delivery guy" bonus points if he yells out "I like it when you call me big papa (John): during the sack session
36.Steal the most expensive textbook from the bookstore and use it as a doorstop
37.Put your Halloween costume back on and head to Advanced Calculus
38.Try to get tazered by campus security
39.Pull a Lewinsky and blow the (school) president's perfect record
40.Do some missionary work at home" with a member of Campus Crusaders for Christ
41.Make like Dick Cheney and shoot a member of College Republicans in the face – rifle optional
42.Douche
43.Write a dirty letter to the editor
44.Participate in class
45.Volunteer to teach underprivileged children how to read….just kidding
46.Take off your Livestrong bracelet
47.Make some deals
48.Spank your sociology professor
49.Study anatomy
50.Pull a Gina Volpe and shout "Is that Elton John I hear?" at the bar nearest you.
51.Throw a tailgate for the last chess competition of the semester (chess is a spring sport, right?)
52.Deflower a freshman in the school garden
53.Pay homage to College Park
54.Return your roommate's vibrator
55.Take the time to read and respond to all of our articles here on College Humor
56.Get your guy friends together and rent Brokeback Mountain
57.Ask that loser who likes you out on a date, just for shits and giggles
58.Start a controversy of any kind
59.Register to vote – seriously" they should be called "RepubliCAN'Ts"
60.Have a 7.3 way
61.Exfoliate
62.Slip and slide in the nude
63.Do it doggy-style with yo dawg
64.Stop wearing your shower shoes out
65.Start taking that STD medication (hey, we aren't here to make judgments)
66.Call the students at the neighboring college "leeches" in your comic strip, "Mockular"
67.Stop listening to country music (better late than never)
68.Have sex on the graduation stage – bonus points if you do it during the ceremony
69.Duh.

If your spring's having trouble getting sprung, e-mail us at datemandm@hotmail.com for more ideas.