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You do know that "pop" music is short for popular music, right? It is specifically engineered to be liked by the majority of humans. You cannot spend more than 4 hours listening to popular radio in a car without liking that One Direction song or that other Katy Perry song. This is not a quirky opinion. The only reason you think it is is because you think of yourself as a cool, unique, snowflake of a human. Don't do that. You're just like everyone else. Start a private session on Spotify and embrace it.

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What are you doing? Come on. Sending a LinkedIn request is a clear declaration that you are unemployed, desperate, and woefully behind on Internet trends. It is a warning to all your college friends with better jobs and ex-internship supervisors that you're going to ask for a favor soon. Luckily, ignoring your LinkedIn request will be good practice for when they ignore the inevitable late-night email containing your resume and a pathetic excuse for a cover letter that you will send a few weeks later.

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Fox News is a conservative news network. You know this. It's what it's known for. If you're watching Fox News, you're probably watching it in order to see conservative commentary. Being surprised by it is like being surprised that the Daily Show's commentary skews liberal or that comments on all news websites skew batshit insane. Welcome to the world of news. It's been like this for a while.

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Hashtagging things serves an actual organizational purpose on Twitter. It doesn't do anything when you do it for random words in your Facebook status except make you look like some kind of tween turd.

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If I follow you on Twitter, I don't want to read your Tweets in two places. If I don't follow you on Twitter, it's because I don't want to read your Tweets at all. Even if you decided to sync your two social networks in order to draw followers from Facebook to Twitter, dumping a random selection of disjointed sentence fragment replies to unknown Twitter handles on your friends' news feeds is not the way to do it. #stopit

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The Internet is full of people getting worked up about things that they deem "offensive" because they might offend other people, but don't actually offend the person claiming offense in the first place. It sounds confusing, but it's not. It's just dumb. Being offended by something is already a pointless response, so getting fake offended is doubly pointless. If you think my opinion on bacon is wrong, argue the facts and leave your hypothetical feelings out. And for fuck's sake, stop trying to start serious discussions in comment sections.