Welcome to Idiotech, the column where we shame your parents, teachers, and other old people for being dumb about technology. If you think your parents are even stupider than this, submit your story at the bottom of this page.

RightClick But Im LeftHanded

A couple years ago I asked my dad what he wanted for his screen saver, and his response was, "Make it so I know what to do to make the thing go away." So, that's what I did. I made the screen saver a swirling string of silver letters saying "Move The Mouse," so he'd know what to do in case it ever came on. About two years later, my father turns on the computer and walks away to make himself a coffee, returning to the computer he screams, "SUE! THE COMPUTER'S BROKEN!" My mother rushes over the the computer and asks, "Well, what's it say?" My dad, tilting his head to the angle of the bouncing letters says, "move...the...mouse." My mom touches the mouse, moving it about a quarter of an inch... the screen saver disappears... "Oh..." and my father sits down and uses the computer as if nothing happened. - Anonymous 

I was watching TV with my grandmother over Thanksgiving Break and the Gieco commercial comes on and she said "Oh, I didn't know woodchucks actually chuck wood." - Anonymous

My mum heard me listening to a song in you tube so she came to see what I was doing. After spending half an hour explaining how you tube was not the radio, she then asked, "So can you only see this one thing unless you put stuff in?" I smiled and nodded until she left. - Anonymous

I asked my co-worker if she used Google checkout to purchase some office supplies. She responded " I dont have a google account, I just have gmail." I had to literally bite my tongue. - Anonymous

My mom will send me texts such as cllmewnugthme (call me when you get home) because she believes that you are charged per character, rather than per message. - Anonymous

My dad still makes mix tapes, and gives them out to friends and family. He also recently got an iPhone for work, but doesn't use it for anything but emails and phone calls because he "doesn't want to pay for the app" to sync his iPhone to his computer and add CDs. - Anonymous

I graduated from college and my parents always ask me who I'm still "corresponding" with from school. - Anonymous

Today, my dad asked me how to turn on the laptop. After telling him to press the "Turn On" button, he asked me how to go onto the internet. I told him to double click the icon that looks like an "E", he then proceeded to click it about 6 times. Gave up, then asked me how to open a text messsage on his phone, and how to find someone's number in his phone's phonebook. This happens once every 3 days or so. It's frustrating to say the least. - Anonymous 

Today I had to explain to my mom that not answering calls because you forgot your phone, doesn't mean that your phone is broken. She just bought a new phone that has twenty extra $ on the bill so she can complain about another "broken" phone - Anonymous

My father refers to Facebook as "FaceSpace". I have yet to correct him. - Anonymous 

I'm on the local fire department in my town and one of the older members just put in a request for a new computer, one that comes with spell check. - Anonymous 

I work in an office with a bunch of....older people...and as such, I get all of the tech questions when it comes to computers, email, and our website. One day, one of our salesmen was in our conference room with a client. He called me in there for some help and tells me that he turned on the plasma TV that we use for a monitor in there, but it turned back off and he can't get the computer to work. I look down and proceed to tell him in front of his big client, that the computer needs to be ON for it to come up on the screen. Troubleshooting must not be a skill set in the Golden Years.... - Anonymous