So there's this holiday where everyone is supposed to get a kiss at midnight – except it happens in the one month of the year that we're living with our parents. Thanks God. That was a good one.

Last year, everyone knew exactly what they were doing for New Year's Eve by mid September. This year, I know people who still aren't sure where they're going. I guess it's more important to have plans when you think everyone you know might blow up.

Why do some people feel so strongly about which year is actually the first year of the millennium? So what if you're right? It's like guessing the ending to a show on the WB. Even if you nailed it completely, will bragging to anyone actually help you?

This year went by pretty quickly. It seems like just yesterday that morons were using conspiracy theories to scare other morons.

In 2000, the political world saw a deadlocked election. The sports world saw the first Subway Series. The business world saw the sudden rise and fall of dot-coms. And the college world saw some kids sitting around watching Dark Side of the Moon and taking hits off a gravity bong. Sometimes, the more things change, the more things stay the same.

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