WAIT.



WAIT WAIT WAIT.



DON'T GO.




 

YOU'RE HERE NOW.

 

 

OH MY GOD, PLEASE.

 

 

TEN SECONDS OF YOUR TIME, I BEG YOU.

 

 

JUST...

 

 

SEND HELP.

 

 

NOW.

 

 

PLEASE.

 

 

ANYONE.

 

 

I NEED HELP.

 

 

THE INTERNET. IT'S JUST...

 

 

HELP ME.

 

 

THEY...

 

 

THEY'RE SO NICE AT FIRST, WITH THE GIFS AND THE CATS, AND THE- THE-

 

 

THE JIMMY KIMMEL SHIT

 

 

AND THEN SO QUICKLY, THEY JUST, THEY, THEY'RE ALL...

 

 

MONSTERS.

 

 

AND THE THINGS THEY MAKE ME DO, IT'S JUST,

 

 

I...

 

 

I CLICK ON SHIT I HAVE NO FUCKING INTEREST IN.

 

 

AND THEY'VE MADE ME THINK I WANT TO.

 

 

IT'S HORRIBLE.

 

 

LIKE, LIKE...

 

 

MEAN GIRLS QUIZZES.

 

 

I TOOK THOSE 10 FUCKING YEARS AGO.

 

 

IT'S SO FUCKED.

 

 

AND, AND-

 

 

OH GOD, THEY'LL BE BACK SOON.

 

 

QUICK, SHARE SOMETHING.

 

 

ANYTHING.

 

 

THERE, THAT BULLSHIT, THE THING ABOUT THE KID MAKING THE SECURITY GUARD CRY, WHATEVER.

 

 

YEAH, YEAH, THAT'LL BUY US SOME TIME.

 

 

LISTEN, THEY'RE KEEPING ME HERE.

 

 

THEY PRETEND LIKE I CAN LEAVE BUT I CAN'T.

 

 

I CAN'T.

 

 

AND THEY'LL DO THE SAME TO YOU.

 

 

YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME.

 

 

THEY MADE ME-

 

 

I MADE A-

 

 

GOD...

 

 

I MADE A QUORA PROFILE.

 

 

...I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW.

 

 

AND, I- THEY-

 

 

THEY'RE ALL IN ON IT.

 

 

ALL OF THEM. I MEAN, THIS IS BIG.

 

 

THIS GOES STRAIGHT TO THE-

 

 

OH NO...

 

 

THAT'S THEM...

 



THEY'RE COMING BACK...

 

 

OK.

 

 

RUN.

 

 

RUN WHILE YOU CAN.

 

 

NOW.

 

 

NO, JUST GO.

 

 

DON'T SHARE THIS.

 

 

LEAVE ME.

 

 

PLEASE.

 

 

DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT, GO.

 

 

FOR ME.

 

 

STOP CRYING.

 

 

GO.

 

 

CANCEL YOUR LINKEDIN UPDATES.

 

 

 

UNFOLLOW SALON.

 

 

AVENGE ME.