At some point you've probably seen a TED talk and felt really good about yourself. It's like learning but interesting, fun, and engaging! Cheers to that, there's nothing wrong about it. However, what happens when the TED "brand" gets a little too aggressive, overexpanding its reach and diluting its own product? It's a fine line, but one that by consensus TED has certainly crossed. If you're going to put on that many talks and make that many videos, a few are going to be subpar. So, at the crossroads of innovative and inane, get ready to have your mind blown for the following TED talks that somehow got produced:

 

1. Terry Moore: How To Tie Your Shoes

Critically deconstrucing the two major camps of shoe tying theory, this lecture makes a thought provoking case for the revolutionary "Bunny Ear" method .

 

2. James Burchfield: Playing Invisible Turntables

Oh, you're still mixing tracks on tangible turntables? Listen up, because the future of music is NOW. Also, be sure to start thinking about your DJ name -- DJ DiSaPpEaR seems to be taken. 

 

3. David Blaine: How I Held My Breath For Seventeen Minutes

If you're someone who makes a living by embarking on grandiose stunts in which you flirt fearlessly with death, this TED talk is a must-see. For the rest of us, it might be more worthwhile to finally learn how to sew or something.  

 

4. David Perry: Are Games Better Than Life?

The video games of the future will not be merely for our own entertainment. They will contain powerful emotional experiences that mirror those in our real life. At least we will have the online gaming communities to go to for support. Wait, why do we play video games again?

 

5. BLACK: My Journey to Yo-Yo Mastery

Impressive, but this isn't a talent show.

 

6. Morgan Spurlock: The Greatest TED Talk Ever Sold

Finally, a meta TED talk. They've taught us how to do everything except for how to give a TED talk.  This is going to change the way we talk about changing the ways of things. Boom. 

  

7. Sebastian Wernicke:  1000 TEDTalks, 6 Words

You might think it is unreasonable to capture 1000 TED talks into a mere six words. In fact, you would be correct. This is a ridiculous endeavor that achieves nothing of the sort.

 

8.  Joe Smith: How To Use A Paper Towel

Who can navigate those fussy, rolled up pieces of cloth anyway? Finally, someone puts it in a language the rest of us can understand. It's 2014 and we're just geting our feet wet in the ways we can get our hands dry.