There are some songs that everyone agrees were made to be played in the bedroom, songs that just always seem to make you feel sexy and get you in the mood. The problem is that eventually these songs get too old and over used that they become nothing more than a parody of what they used to be. These are 5 of the hottest songs turned to jokes:
What you used to picture: When this song played you would immediately imagine a Danielle Steel novel. Two people in a soft lit room, slowly undressing, kissing passionately. The token of romance.
What you picture now: a couple of the most unattractive people you know, probably in their early '50s, trying to reignite the passion of their youth by playing the most worn-out sex song they could think of. Most likely they typed in "sexiest songs" on their default Bing search engine and this was the first result. They lie uncomfortably on the bed,trying to do stuff that their current health conditions won't allow, and finish 48 seconds into the song.
What you used to picture: A sexy striptease show by the hottest person you can imagine, dressed in enticing outfits that they will peel off little by little until you can't take it anymore and just want to tear everything that's left on off their body.
What you picture now: A lanky, nerdy guy trying to be sexy and undress, but ending up embarrassing himself when his jeans get stuck half way down his ankles and he starts hopping on one leg trying to get them off. He drops his glasses and accidentally steps on them barefoot and the moment that was never there is now even further away.
What you used to picture: Paris, the most romantic and passionate city on earth. Two lovers holding each other, preparing to engage in dirty, obscene acts that you can never even imagine, but are actually not that big of a deal in Europe.
What you picture now: A commercial for some chocolate brand, with a woman pining over a cup of hot cocoa with her bedroom eyes, in what is maybe the most cliche'd of subtext for sex. "Oh, the hell with this diet, I'm going for it"!
What you used to picture: Raw, animal sex on a deserted island, when there is no one else in the world besides you and your lover, ravaging each other like it's your last day on earth.
What you picture now: A seedy bar, reaking of booze and failure. A dirty guy with slick hair and various venereal diseases lies on a former stripper in the back room. It could actually be Chris Isaak. Either way it's kind of gross. And if that still gets you in the mood for some reason, mid-way you'll have a flashback to Ross cheating on Rachel and that'll end it.
What you used to picture: Every person on earth getting weak at the knees at the sound of Barry White's deep voice. An instant turn on for any situation. Even the nerdiest person turns into a sex machine.
What you picture now: Barry White having sex.