They are alive, and they are messing with you.
They are judging your life.
They are eating your money and WRITING NOTES!
The machines are demanding love.
They are sabotaging your hydration attempts.
They are pulling a clever scheme to make cold hard cash off of you.
THIS NOTE IS NOT A JOKE!
The calculators are trolling you.
The ATMs are trolling you.
THE CAMERAS ARE COMMUNICATING!!
VENDING MACHINES ARE NOW TAKING YOUR FOOD!