The existence of Facebook has managed to make us permanent 'friends' with a cross-section of people who, 15 years ago, we would've completely fallen out of touch with and never had a second thought about them. Here's 10 categories of Friends that only exist now thanks to the wonderfully unnecessary permanence of the ol' "Big Bluey" (my cool nickname for FB):
Meeting your friends' new boyfriend/girlfriend is almost always just a countdown to eventually never interacting with that random human ever again, but now, thanks to the magic of Facebook, you can stay informed that the nondescript Tinder dude who your friend brought to your 2014 Oscars party for an hour is now renting an AirBNB in Bogota for a week! Have fun, that guy! I think he was from San Diego?
You could unfriend this person, but it's not like you broke up with them, plus your friend who dated them is still friends with them, so what's your excuse? Congrats! Now you're vaguely in the loop forever.
Oh yeah! That German exchange student who rented your other bedroom for a month before your friend could move in. He stayed in his room the whole time and only emerged to cook a can of black beans that he ate in his room while listening to music til 6:30 am. Subletter for a month, friend 4 LYFE.
Do you enjoy making ten minutes of smalltalk when your friend's parents are visiting and the dad has to use your bathroom for a bit before they all go out to dinner? Then you'll LOVE having your friend's mom see everything you ever post to Facebook and having her 'like' very specific inside jokes that she couldn't possibly have gotten but you'd feel bad pointing that out to her!
Oh yeah, that dude! He's 6 years older than you and used to send 9-paragraph long "fun" emails about Friday in-the-office Happy Hours to keep morale up in an office where everyone was technically an intern working 50 hours a week and getting paid for 10. Now he's on a boat in Montauk. Enjoy that boat, person!
I guess I knew someone named Amanda at some point in my life? That breakfast place she's at looks cool. Godspeed, A!
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