1. Give her a foot massage every day

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2. Tell her that "God spent a little more time on her"

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...since she is divinely chosen to lead.


3. Formalize the autocratic monarchy with yo girl as the queen regnant in a violent coup wherein you consolidate your military and political power with her as the central figure

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4. Get the local feudal lords to swear fealty to her

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Who wouldn't wanna swear fealty to DAT ASS, right fellas?



5. Give more than you receive in bed ;)

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6. Offer her your seed so that she may bear children to continue her royal lineage. If your seed is not viable, find her a discrete consort who can provide her offspring, lest the monarchy fall to outside influences when the queen's fertility comes into question.

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Have the consort quietly executed upon confirmation that the queen is with child. No one can know the sordid truth...



7. Give her chocolates and love letters on non-special occasions - make sure EVERY day is Valentine's Day for yo girl.

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Also she has grown cold and distant as the power of her position became normalized in her mind. She is cruel to her subjects and even crueler to those closest to her. Lavish praise on her - do not give her even an inkling of a reason to be displeased with you, lest your head be separated from your body as punishment for a perceived slight.



8. Flush out traitorous advisors and noblemen in her court, try them for crimes against the crown, and see to their executions.

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Better them than you.