Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
12 Tinder Profiles Guaranteed to Get a Laugh
August 9, 2017
Swipe it like it's hot.
1. Wait do you have the number for your big grey friend, though?
2. Sorry, I don't negotiate with terrorists.
3. Your horoscope for today is getting boned by the horoscope.
4. Throw in a shoe shine free o' charge gov'nah!
5. These will be the vows I write on my wedding day.
6. If we don't talk about it, who will?
7. This ain't a Tinder profile, it's a goddamn arms race.
8. Doctors orders.
9. Do you have a popcorn setting?
10. They do say that.
11. Crushed. Just absolutely crushed.
12. No man is as cool as this man.
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.