You cannot hide it. Your awkwardness always shines through, despite your best efforts to conceal it. These people are so goddamn awkward they created MUCH MORE awkward situations for themselves. It's impressive, really.
1. fubarkbm with the weakest game in the biz
When I was in high school, I had a huge crush on a girl who worked at the drive thru of my bank. I would go to a different branch, withdraw some cash and then deposit it at her branch's drive thru in hopes she was working. It wasn't until much later that I realized she could more than likely see I had made a withdrawal for the exact amount I was depositing just minutes before.
2. A common thread: like many, hahaixusjskjaakkaak would rather go down with the ship than speak up
When I was around 5 or 6 I was playing at a friend's house outside and I was too nervous to ask to use the bathroom (plus I had never gone inside their house) so I peed my pants and left without saying anything lol.
3. thecoolrobot knows how to get the ladies: borderline stalking
Back in primary school I had a crush on a girl, her younger brother was kind of a friend, so I'd hang out at their place every once in a while.
Thinking it would be weird to ask if I could hang out, I'd go for a run past their place and hope they'd notice me and invite me in.
It worked, but most times I had to turn back and run past at least 4 times before they'd invite me in..
4. Just did it so you could tie the wrapper into a knot with your tongue right, LikesComcast?
Last weekend I was eating starbursts and a lady approached me so naturally, I put a wrapped starburst in my mouth.
5. kpc45 would rather be late than have to keep talking
I ran into a past coworker at a bus depot, had nothing really to talk about and it got awkward fast. A bus came and the guy said this is me, it was the one I was waiting for too but I didn't get on cause what the hell would happen if I did. Made it worse as he got on I said drive safe.
6. ilalmtae implementing a tactical business power move
I was really anxious for one of my first adult meetings that I was doing so I looked up the person I was meeting with and when they came in to shake my hand I introduced myself as them.
They thankfully laughed it off and just said, "no, that's my name". I cringe everytime I think about it.
7. Humblepoptart doing something I definitely would also do
I rode my bike to college one time and had no bike lock. So I tied it up with an extra show string I had hoping any passerby would see it was "locked" without investigating too closely. As I'm leaving class I see a couple students standing by my bike taking pictures of my lock job and laughing. I sat like 50 yards away in shame waiting for them to leave before I retrieved my bike and left.
8. Avatar-State getting an unplanned workout in
I said bye to someone and we both walked toward the elevators in the hospital. It was just too awkward for me so I proceeded to take the stairs down 12 flights instead...
9. potential_penguin being impressively awkward, actually
The first time I took a bus in a new city, I pulled the stop request cord at the wrong stop. Instead of just being a normal person and telling the driver that I didn't mean to do that, I got off the bus and walked for an hour in the rain.
10. 7 years is SO MUCH TIME, Namffohcl
Allowed my neighbor to call me the wrong name for 7 years because I never corrected him the first time he said it wrong.
11. badass_panda doesn't need other people's help because he's an Assassin's Creed character apparently
Accidentally locked myself on the roof of my office's parking garage ... it was my first week there and I didn't know the doors closed behind you and locked, I'd left my access badge on my desk.
Rather than call for help and be "that guy", I ... climbed down the side of the parking garage.
12. cccoffeeegurl shows one how not to be rude
My friend's mom rolled my hand up in the window of the car while I was in the backseat. It hurt really bad but I was too awkward to say anything so I rode for about 10 minutes with half of my little hand squashed and hanging out the rolled-up window. I think eventually I said "um... ow" or something to alert her to the situation.
13. CupcakeCulprit playing it super smooth to avoid small talk
Saw a colleague I actually like in the supermarket. Did not want to stop-and-chat and engage in weird small talk in a shop.
I proceeded to awkwardly walk backwards when I spotted her in the aisle and whispered slightly loud to my SO at the time "I hope she can't see me". She turned her face, looked at me and said "I can see AND I can hear you!"
14. Let the DJ know you appreciate him, thegiantcat1
I was at a club once, the DJ was taking requests to make a request you had to fill out a slip of paper and give it to him. Anyways I do this walk over and hand it to him and he was like
"Alright man nice" and held out his hand.
For some reason I though, oh he wants to hold hands and held his hand for like 10 seconds (fingers interlaced even) and just looked at each other the whole time. Then It hit me that he wanted a high five and I got super embarrassed.
15. To be fair "I'm cool, doesn't bother me" is a phenomenal catch-all response tho, b-cola
I was doing a job interview in high school. The interview was going well and The lady asked me "how important is hygiene to you?". During this moment I forgot what hygiene meant and should've asked. Instead I tried to act relaxed and said "I'm cool" "doesn't bother me".
I didn't get the job.
16. Pro tip: You can't get a job without a KittenyCuddles hug
I hugged a job interviewer when I was 16. The interview had concluded and she opened the door and stretched out her arm towards me to indicate I was free to go. For some reason I saw it as an invitation to hug and we had the most awkward one-armed hug/back pat ever.
17. elfardoo just being an absolute maniac
As an undergrad, I was invited to a halloween costume party. I only knew the person who invited me, and everyone there seemed to know each other, so I was like the odd man out. After about 30 minutes of pounding jungle juice and standing around awkwardly, I went outside, buzzed, to escape. I wanted to go home, but my friend had driven me. So, instead, I found a gap in the shrubbery around the house's foundation and hid there, watching other drunks come and go from my cloak of concealment. This is was all fine and well until a girl noticed me and I guess startled because she screamed and made a scene. I booked it out of there and walked, in costume, a couple miles to a convenience store to call a relative to come pick me up. That was the last time that friend invited me to a party.
18. Mustn't cause a scene and *gasp* OPEN A PRINTER. Play it safe, ilalmtae
I needed one sheet of blank printer paper from the computer lab at my college. There were maybe 5 other students in there when I walked in and I was afraid that pulling open the paper drawer on the printer would be super loud and disruptive so I logged on to a computer and printed out 5 blank pieces of paper instead.