NSFW obviously. 

Each of these parodies was made by Wood Rocket. I'm not going to link you, ok, you know how Google works.

1. SpongeKnob SquareNuts 

Coming outta the gate hot with a Spongebob who appears to have festering lesions moreso than holes. This porn parody honestly also functions as a parody for 1902's A Trip to the Moon. There is no sound I want associated with sexual activity less than a Spongebob Squarepants laugh.

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Moisterize me.

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2. Gnardians of the Galaxy

Hopefully this isn't super faithful to the movie otherwise Groin's gonna get his ass circumcised and have to become Baby Groin in the sequel.

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Release me.

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3. Assventure Time 

Jake the Dog can morph himself into anything. So we humbly ask him to morph himself into literally anything but this. 

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Save me.

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4. Tugrats

They do make a firm point in saying all the babies are adults now, which is good. But Tommy is still wearing a diaper despite that and there's a CGI Reptar with a boner. So.

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5. The Porn Literally Nobody Asked For

Not every porn parody monstrosity needs to be wearing a cheap costume from Party City. Some come in everyday packages, like this one - a man playing disgraced crack smoking Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, in a sex tape 0 people on the planet demanded.

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6. Ten Inch Mutant Ninja Turtles

You gotta give it up for the Wes Anderson Fantastic Mr. Fox aesthetic they go for here. Costume and design wise, this is MUCH less visually upsetting than SpongeKnob, until you see their big green dicks money-shot green ooze. That, my friends, I wish upon none of you.

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7. Cockraiser

See, it's like Hellraiser, but the needles are dicks. You're up to speed.

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8. Frosty the Snowman

Let's take the Frosty the kids know and love and give him a mangled face with black teeth. Dude looks like he's lived a thousand lifetimes, all of which he has begged the sun to melt him from. Carrot cock is a 10/10 tho.

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9. Dick and Morty

I've only just barely recovered from the leagues of people shrieking Pickle Rick. I simply can't afford for Dickle Dick to rope me back into that hellscape.

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10. American Dad XXX

A real live, breathing alien would be much less unsettling than this veiny eyed heinous beast.

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11. Strokémon

Please, for the love of God. Put Pikachu in it's Pokeball. Just this once.

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End my suffering.

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12. Mighty Muffin Power Pounder Rangers

Alright this one's just fuckin cool as hell not gonna lie. 

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13. Katy Perry fucking a puppet

Remember back in 2010 when Katy Perry got in trouble for showing too much cleave singing a song with Elmo on Sesame Street? Well now she's fucking him. You're only supposed to tickle or hug him. That's it.

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BONUS: Game of Bones

Pretty much all of these videos come from Wood Rocket, who definitely know what they're doing. While costuming and budgets may not be their strong suits, the writing is genunely funny and I found myself laughing scrubbing through the plot of each one of these vids. Here Rob Stark make believe sicks his Direwolf on I believe the Lannister army, and I mean c'mon. This better be in the new season.

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