Feeling a ping in your internet sweet tooth?

Then, hey, psst, kid, come here, we got some delicious Twitter candy for you. Just hop right in my unmarked, windowless van, that's right, right here next to Uncle Hannah and I'll give you exactly the sugar rush you're looking for. 

Just don't tell your parents we gave it to you. 


1. Throw a yellow polkadot bikini on that shrimp and you've got yourself the ultimate crossover event of the century. 

2. Come on man, you know I can't think past dinner time.

3. *Chaine up desserts screaming for help from my basement* 

4. It was a meatraculous recovery.

5. The uprising shall BEGIN!

6. I'm smart but I have no self control. Also I'm not that smart. 

7. Do not touch the forbidden fruit!

8. Much more impress than that thing Jesus did, imo. 

9. This is what getting swol looks like, takes notes. 

10. Don't drag me into this, not this time!

11. Sir, you're missing half an arm. Yeah? And a Cheesy Gordita Crunch, my brotha. 

12. Cut my life into pizza, this is my plastic fork. 

13. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?