May cause anal leakage.
I realized I had a problem with pornography the other day so I went to talk to my priest. He doesn’t have a password for Bangbus either.
Loud Roommate Who Has No Sense of Humor
Guy: Worst thing about living here is the sandpaper we have to wipe with in the bathroom.
Roommate: WHAT SANDPAPER!? WHY NOT JUST USE THE ONE PLY TOILET PAPER THEY HAVE?? ITS A LITTLE ROUGH BUT IT GETS THE JOB DONE!!!!!!!
A Viking Gets Soap In His Eye During His War Cry
Yyyeeaaaaaaaaiiiieeeerrrggghhhh!!!
Ancient Proverb
A Wise man once said, “Lays potato chips are terrible.”
Not every porn title is a great idea—just look at Naughty America's "My Sister's Hot Mom."
Comic-con Pick-Up Lines
"Are you Bruce Banner's anger, 'cause you're making me huge."
"You must be a radioactive spider cause I'm shooting out warm sticky white liquid right now."
"You must be Aquagirl because your vagina smells like fish."
I was watching TV and I saw someone I thought had down syndrome in the audience. I went back with my DVR and it turns out the kid just had big glasses and was a flappy clapper.
My class is at 10:15 and it takes me thirty minutes to get ready. Today I wanted to eat some breakfast so I set my alarm for 9:11. Too soon?
Guy Who Doesn't Understand What It Means To Be Environmentally Conscious
"Hey guys! Guess what! I just printed up 100,000 flyers that say STOP WASTING PAPER! Oh man, we are so gonna save the earth!"
The 7-Year Old Who Follows Current Events
"If you ask me, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales should be forced to enter an iron cage match with Stone Cold Steve Austin AND Brock Lesnar."
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