Picture The first 8-year-old to be accepted to every fraternal organization in America, no questions asked.
Picture Don't laugh, she had a tainted beef burrito at the football game and the line was just sickly long.
Picture "This was a private event only open to immediate family. Somehow our mentally disabled second cousin Percy breached security"
Picture Are you sure the quotes are enough? People might still miss it. Better put Christmas lights around it.
Picture If you think Colonel Sanders is a friendly old man, you should meet the guy who runs Pure Pleasure.
Picture I like to believe that, somewhere out there, there's a girl with an "I strive to hookup with douche bags" tattoo meant for him.
Picture Should I wear the purple stretch pants or my Halloween sweater? Oh what the hell I'll just wear both.