Picture A cooler you can ride around on. Is the Cruzin' Cooler the greatest invention of the past 25 years? Before you answer, notice that it comes with a sidecar for your dog.
Picture "We locked him out on the balcony for pissing his pants on our couch. When he woke up in a drunkin stupor he used the cooler as a battering ram to get back in."
Picture "He passed out on his couch and we shamed him nicely, then he woke up 2 hours later and walked into his kitchen, propped open my cooler and took a dump in it. Then he got up and passed right back out. Cheers from SUNY Oswego."
Picture Cooler race accidents have spiked sharply this year, leading Americans to ask themselves "Just what the hell is cooler racing?"
Picture From all the way down under, a UTE (whatever the hell that is) converted into a mobile mini fridge/dead hooker transport unit.