Someone tried to hotbox earth.
Maybe he's just going fast.
"The California Forest Fires. What......Too soon???"
Dude, I dare you to lick it.
"Some guy robbed the liquor store in second level of the strip mall.  A police standoff followed, then he locked himself in and set it on fire (he showed those cops).  The store burned down but the sign survived." Mmmmm... toasty!
The ole' free haircut trick.
"Eh, there's probably nobody inside."

Nothing found...

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