Ketchuptron 3000 Rampage
    Real-Life Donkey Kong Goes on Suburban Rampage
    Soccer Player Scores Goal, Goes on Rampage
    "Forty five minutes after he woke up, he freed a hand and cut himself loose with a paring knife.  He then went on a rampage with a fire extinguisher.  And those are pans with silverware on his back to let us know when he wakes up."

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