Ten Commandments of Kreegism:
1. I am the Kreeg, your Mr. You shall have no other Kreegs before me. (they weren't quick enough to dodge the coat hanger).
2. You shall not make for yourself an idol, unless it be made of coat hangers and rusty knives.
3.You shall not misuse the name Kreeg. Okay uses include, Fuck you Kreeg, You were a mistake Kreeg and Is it in yet, Kreeg??
4. Remember the Abortion Day by keeping it holy. ie only on wednesday girls, consider it the antithesis of Hump Day.
5. Honor your father and mother...fuck that, they didn't want you in the first place. Punch your mom and slap your dad on the ass while screaming "I made it you bastards! Blow me! Whoooo!"
6. You shall not murder (with a fist, coat hanger, knife, etc.) Use the morning after pill for those little oopsie daisies!
7. Remember to bob and weave in the womb. It makes you harder to hit. Also, adultery is why you're here. Your mom...huge whore. Talk to her about it.
8. Steal from your parents. They're bastards anyway, see above for proof.
9. Maybe I should only have 8 commandments...false testimony is for chumps.
10. It's okay to want other people's stuff, like their life or their siblings, I don't have either because of coat hangers...
Now go forth and spread the gospel.
December 22nd, 2006