Fat Kid Loves Bacon

This kid can't live without bacon, but he won't live with it. It's a catch 22.

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The limits of customer satisfaction

I work on a ferry that travels between the US and Canada. One day at work a lady came up to me and she was big, a solid 350 pounds. She told me she had dropped about $10 worth of loonies and toonies ($1 and $2 Canadian coin), quarters, and nickels in one of the women's restroom toliets and asks if we can get them out for her. While this already is kind of gross me and a... Read More » co-worker close the restroom so can go in. She points to the stall it happened in and then mentions to us that after they fell in she still did her business. We look and there is a truly massive, MASSIVE shit in the toliet. I looked at her and said there was no way she would be getting that money back. She then went to my boss and told him I had refused to do it and said I should be fired for refusing service to a passenger. He looked at her and said "He is about as likely to get fired for refusing to help you as you are to fitting in a size 6". I love my boss sometimes.