By Patrick Cassels
SUPER : THIS CHRISTMAS. OPTIMUS PRIME (V.O.) ...We are autonomous robotic organisms from Cybertron. SUPER: SEE TRANSFORMERS IN A WHOLE NEW DIMENSION... MEGATRON (V.O.) ...You fight for the weak. That is why you lose. SUPER: ...ONE FIREBALL WIPE to black. A single HORIZONTAL LINE stretches across the screen. All characters and objects in the film are tiny colored segments trapped on this line. A small silver segment slides into frame. This is MEGATRON. OPTIMUS PRIME slides in from the other side. It's silly. MEGATRON I'll destroy you, Optimus! OPTIMUS LINE SEGMENT Let's end this, Megatron! The two line segments slide toward each other, clash. We hear AMAZING BATTLE NOISES. Another FIRE WIPE. OPTIMUS LINE SEGMENT Transformers assemble: Bumblebee, Ratchet, Jazz, Ironhide. As Optimus lists them off we cut to "profile" shots of each Transformer. They're all, yup, line segments. BUMBLEBEE Check! RATCHET Affirmative! IRONHIDE Hey, bub! BUMBLEBEE Yo! OPTIMUS Autobots, TRANSFORM! AMAZING SFX. The Autobot lines get get smaller. SAM Am I actually seeing this right now?! A new FLASHY TRANSITION. JOHN TURTURRO The Decepticons are too powerful. They have tanks... CUT TO a moving line with tank SFX. JOHN TURTURRO (CONT'D) Planes... CUT TO a moving line with plane SFX. JOHN TURTURRO (CONT'D) Elaborate underground drills. CUT TO a moving line with drill SFX. OPTIMUS It matters not. I have vowed to protect this world, from one connecting point to the other. SUPER: 2 SIDES... 1 COORDINATE IN SPACE. OPTIMUS PRIME We must find the sacred Cube before they do. SAM What's a "cube?" SUPER: NO WIDTH. JOHN TURTURRO We don't know where the Decepticons are hiding. (beat) But we do know it can only be in one direction. SUPER: NO DEPTH. MEGAN FOX I'm scared Sam, hold me. Two lines join to make one big, romantic line. SUPER: NO MERCY. CLOSE UP on Megatron. MEGATRON Behold, the Decepticon's newest weapon, and tremble! Ominous music rises as another segment slowly enters near Megatron, like the saucers in Independence Day. GENERAL LINE SEGMENT My God. Call the President. (beat) NOW! A few line segment bureaucrats scurry out, "Yes sir..." TITLE CARD: TRANSFORMERS IN 1-D.